The Choke Hold

In Physical Science the other day, my friend Shawn and I were discussing the way couples walk when they're with each other, instead of listening to the lesson on disorder (I know enough about it anyways).

He was talking about how he saw this couple walking arm-in-arm in what he called the 'cuddle walk'. He compared it to Private Ryan when the soldiers carry the wounded ones to safety. In other words, he said it kind of looked like this:

Even the soldiers don't like it. 

It made me think of all the awkward things that humans do as couples. We sit on each other, hold hands, press our lips together, entangle are limbs about one another, just to name a few. While I can handle most of these (I'm a pretty affectionate person), there is one 'gesture' of love that I simply cannot take. I call it The Choke Hold.

Can't you see they're in love?

Normally this happens when a really tall guy wraps one arm around his rather petite girlfriend's neck as they walk towards there destination, or as they eat lunch on the same side of the booth because they love to be nauseatingly public about their romance. As a petite girl, I've had many a boyfriend attempt this move on me as he walks me to my door, or as we meander about the park, or the mall or something. Heads up, It's not cool guys. 


Surprising fact: Most girls don't like feeling like they're about to fight for their life in the octagon. Crazy, right, but there's something about your pit being shoved up against our face as your bicep tightens around the nape of our neck that just dosen't do it for us. Crazy, right?

So the next time you're saddling up next to a pretty lady, think about the message you're trying to send out? Do you want her to think you're challenging her to a WWF match, or do you want to snuggle?