Monday, December 26, 2011

Saturday, December 24, 2011

The Power of Love is the Sweetest Thing

Alice & Marion Gleason

So normally I do not post personal family things on my blog, but this really touched me. Today I had the opportunity to visit my Grandma (my dad's mom) in the ICU in Orlando. While undergoing chemo, she suffered a heart attack which resulted in a stroke and left her unable to speak.

When I entered the hospital with my family, we met up with my Grandfather who updated us on her recovery progress. He informed us that she was beginning to say Marion (my grandfather's name), Mark (my dad's name) and Mike (one of his brothers). Then, his eyes filled with tears as he added she was also saying 'I love you'.

I got to spend time, stroking my grandma's arm and watching her observe everyone while remaining silent  (a rare state for Gleasons to be in). I could tell by the way she looked at my dad, my sister and I, my mom and my Aunt Melonie that she was exceedingly joyful. I also could see the amount tof love and respect that my Grandparents shared for one another. I always knew they loved each other, but I never really saw it until I saw my Grandfather look at his dear wife today. My heart was touched.

He told us about the prayers he said when he figured out what was going wrong, and about all of the care he's been giving my grandmother since she was diagnosed with cancer just a short time ago. The spirit of love was in that room today, and I know that it's what's keeping my Grandma going. Just today, being surrounded by some of her children and grandchildren helped her gain a little bit more strength. She was almost completing a few sentences by the time we left!

The power of love, true love, for family and friends is really amazing, and after today, I believe it can work miracles. I sure love my family, and I am so grateful that they're mine! Nothing beats getting to see them and laugh with them, or even just sit in the same room with them! Both sides of my family have brought me mass amounts of joy and blessings and I am truly grateful for the Lord's plan which will keep us together for all eternity!

I hope all of you who read this are really enjoying your holidays! Life is fragile, but it's also beautiful! Don't spend a moment forgetting to smile! Merry Christmas!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Home Cookin'

I don't care what anyone says. I'm a southerner.

On a side note: 50 posts! Woo-hoo!

One Day

Go figure I fall in love with a song I had no idea was in that stupid movie until I watch the music video. Aside from the fact that it will now forever be linked to Twilight (gag), this song pulls on all the right heart strings for me. My favorite line (aside from the chorus) :

I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What's standing in front of me
Every breath,
Every hour,
Has come to this.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Life's Lessons

Recently a good friend of mine got engaged to the love of her life. I got to sit and listen to her gush about his cute proposal, the beautiful ring, finding ‘the dress’, and the excitement she has to spend the rest of her life- no eternity- with her best friend. While I couldn’t be happier for her (don't get me wrong, I am super freaking happy for her), sometimes I find myself resenting others because they have the one thing I want- true (true true true) love.

Most people who read this blog know me and know what a “hopeless romantic” I am. My heart skips beats when Taylor Swift belts out “He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said ‘Marry me Juliet, you’ll never have to be alone, I love you and that’s all I really know’” in Love Story. I melt at the sight of a man, particularly one I fancy, holding flowers for me. I practically survive off chick flicks. I swoon at the thought that one day I will see it in his eyes that no matter how dorky I can be (and let me tell you… I can be dorky), how angry I might make him, how ridiculous my overreactions get, he will always, always love me. ME. (Let's face it, I love love!)

For some reason though, I’m struggling finding him- that one guys who is supposed to feel the same, who is supposed to want to be with me all of the time. Want to hold me. Want to dance with me in the rain. Want to look at me the way Jim looks at Pam, the way Michael looks at Holly, the way Beast looks at Belle, the way Mr. Darcy looks at Elizabeth the way my dad looks at my mom (but not the way Edward looks at Bella. I’m good, thanks).

This is where the point I’m going to make comes in. No matter how much I seek after this, dwell on it, hope for it, day dream about it, I’ve come to face the fact that can’t actually have it until I’m ready- and this is where I pose the question: am I? I sure would like to think I am, I mean heck, I was engaged not too long ago! My problem seems to be that I keep leaving out the key factor in this all: the Lord.

The Lord loves me, as he loves all of his children; however, he has a special way of loving me. That’s called ‘Bailey is super stubborn, so I’m going to teach her a little something called ‘patience’ because she can’t seem to wrap her thick head around the concept’. Now, I’m sure he thinks that in a much… kinder, more loving manner, but he thinks it none-the-less.

Sunday was a great day. One girl in my ward stood and bore a beautiful testimony in which she said (something along the lines of) patience shows the Lord you are willing to follow his will and accept the fact that he knows best. It’s a sign that you trust him and are willing to let things happen at a time when he knows is best for you.

Man did that hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that I spend so much of my time worrying and wanting and fretting that I lose myself in my daydreams and I forget the more important things in life. I rush headfirst into things, not thinking twice about the consequences my decisions can bring. Look where that lands me- single, unhappy, and learning a really hard lesson for the umpteenth time.

You’re probably wondering why I’m telling you all of this. I do it because I know that I am not alone in this. While I do have my own unique problems, trusting in the Lord is something a lot of people (I think) struggle with. I figured that by sharing my epiphany, I could help anyone out there who might be facing something similar. I plan on changing, like I said I would before; but this time I mean it.

I’ve found happiness within me, within the Lord, and within his plan. I’m turning myself over to his love and trusting that at the right time, when I am ready, I will find the man I am supposed to ‘walk hand in hand through life’ with.  Yeah, someone out there is going to love me, and while I cannot wait for that day- just the thought of it fills my heart with inexplicable joy- I know that I need to learn to. It will come when I am ready and when he is ready. Let’s just hope that he enjoys holding hands, laughing and kissing in the rain as much as I do.